Breaking up because he won t propose. At least that’s what I get based on their history.
Breaking up because he won t propose Wondering when will he promise. he said something along the lines of "I'm not ready". He came home from that trip and broke up with her the very next day. Because it happened so abruptly, he said I didn't have to move my things out of his apartment. Then Covid hit and his reaction was “oh well, let’s just wait till this is over. Even though he seeks a connection with someone, he won’t go back to his ex-partner. You don't want to be married to someone who's mother is going to insert herself into every decision you make with the full support of your husband. We’ve had conversations where he’s explicitly said “ideally we’ll get married in the next 2 years, but I wanna pay off my debt first. This relationship is toxic right now. NTA This statement alone much sums up your gender: "He won't commit, he's a coward! He just wants to sleep around. Dude won't even buy a house with you. ” We’ve talked about ring plans in detail. He broke up with me twice and I guess he was afraid of commitment. " It's not necessarily that time about how much she wanted out of the relationship but at the same time continued to pressure her boyfriend in to proposing because she was getting We’ve been together about two years now and was looking forward to getting engaged. my wife and i were married two months before the 3rd anniversary of us meeting, and we knew we wanted to get married within a few months. You know you won't so why stay? And as for him not being not the best looking while thinking his women need to be at least an 8, I once read that it can be the mentality developed from watching a lot a porn. We broke up 4 years ago because of this, she felt that I was just stringing her along. I love him so much. I want to be able to help him get the treatment/therapy he needs because I know his family won't take his mental health seriously but he won't let me help unless we're dating. Her mom and her father already talked to me and apologized and reassured me they will support my decision if I decided to break up. Some women are happy to Him saying he doesn't feel safe anymore makes sense because last time he proposed you broke up with him when he developed a drinking problem. He threatened to come to my house but of he didn't because he never comes over. today was probably like the 20th time he’s done this and i’m not begging him to stay anymore. If he can't commit to anything, won't set boundries with his mother, and continues letting her make HUGE LIFE DECISIONS for him, then yes you should consider breaking up. So I flat out tell him I can not marry you. Literally about a week after I broke up with my ex, someone had said that I might want to get back with him if I missed him (I didn’t say that, all I said was I was taking each day as it comes, because I was asked literally 2 days after we broke up if we would get back together) and when I told him what I really said he was kind of relieved But I guess I feel uncomfortable that he would even make his proposal conditional on the basis of my appearance. Our anniversary is this month and I won't be surprised if he was proposing this month, but I had this attack and brought it up. if she wants to break up with him because he wont marry her that is her choice, not his. I broke up with him and I'm very sure about my decision. I was in a relationship where my partner proposed because I gave him an ultimatum. Soak up every moment of having a boyfriend because it’s special and amazing, and if you get married eventually, that boyfriend status is temporary. A lot. 5 years when he proposed. I did try to make him see my point of view. He's even turned it around on me saying Very confused on what to do I was with my girlfriend for almost 7 years. I love him so much but it's clear he doesn't see himself with me long-term. Because he’s not ready now, and he might never be. "A man is a boy because he is unsure if he wants children or marriage at 30", that just sounds like some toxic culture bullshit. First it was a week. For him, its just spending money on a 1 day ceremony. I said know I wasn’t. He will come to you and tell him how much you love and care about him and if he does one day start crying or emotional don’t tell him he not a man or when he’s open just listen because from experience some women hear but not really listen and be open and vulnerable yourself to him because that’s Dear Therapist, For Christmas this year, my boyfriend surprised me with a ring. If you want to get married you should propose instead of just expecting him to do it. Do all the things you failed to do because you settled for a guy who won’t commit. What they've found: sometimes it's not what his ex After he finally gets a promotion, he won’t consider marriage until he has enough money saved to be financially stable, which could be years. These two kinds of relationships are fundamentally different. She won't be there but I want to talk to her family. i feel like there’s something wrong with me, and that’s why they won’t propose. i still. ‘Oh, ok, I’ll move in then. People can break up for whatever reason they want. Make the most out of your time. He needs to stand up and be the man you think he is. and each time i’ve always fought for our relationship and begged him to stay. He said no and expects her to stay as his wife without the title of wife, and he's been stringing her along this whole time by promising a wedding then having every reason not to get married yet. How can I move on from her or is there still a chance I can win her back?. WTF. Maybe he finally caved, said he wanted marriage, and popped the question. I have asked him a few times why he hasn't asked me to marry him yet and even if he wants to marry me, and he has never really gives a straight answer. You seem like you do a lot of talking and not a lot of listening. It’s sapphire and silver—beautiful. I broke up with my bf of 6 years last year because he kept promising to propose and didn’t come through numerous times. “My now ex did the same thing. I mean, with 6 years you should know if u want to marry or not. ” – midnightslip. I [27M]was in a relationship with a girl [26F] for 3 years now. I choose to believe him that he broke up for the reason he stated. I only know that I wont be his girlfriend for 5-6 years, so I can start looking for a husband at the age of 28-29. . Just because he’s hot does not mean his personality is stellar and this right here is a trash bag of a man. It hurts, it hurts so fucking bad. Travel. Yes is is a wonderful loving guy and there's a lot to appreciate about him but the fact that he won't propose will take away from a woman's happines It's not fine to purposefully mislead your partner for years about it. You have gone 8 years w/o a wedding, a honeymoon, 7 years of no anniversary to celebrate. He Won’t Set A Date. And after that week, I kept my ground and told him I would still be breaking up with him. Maybe because you won't let go of something or won't listen or accept his answer whether it's what you may want to hear or not. Sadly, I don’t think there’s much I can add to it. It is very normal for both men and women to experience degrees of fear at the prospect of marriage. ” I informed him. He didn’t date any other girl other than me for two years. I ended up walking back on the break-up because I felt so guilty. In fact he was dreading going back to her. AITA for breaking up with my bf because he told another friend not to get married? Longevity of the relationship doesn't cancel out the fact that she wants to propose because she got pregnant. If you spend most of your time fighting or crying about your insecurities, he won't think you're ready for marriage. Let me add, when I met him, I made a lot more money than he did, he was sleeping in his car and not eating well because he was trying to get back on his feet. He thinks other people will judge him if he marries the first girl he's dated. He broke up with me because he was depressed. Reply reply itsapurseparty • He gave an explanation which I kind of believe. Community for all the people waiting for a wedding. But will he propose? Probably not. I actually pressured him to break up because he was just not communicative anymore and didn’t want to see me. If he thinks that your life won't be complete until you get married, he won't want to propose. It's juvenile af to get married then act like a little **** because he's unhappy with his decision. Because you always worry deep down about if you're good enough or if they're gonna leave again. If he doesn't--he'll be an outcast treated in the community like a piranha. But please do yourself, him, and any imaginary future children a big favor and accept that you guys are fundamentally not made for eachother. Never have I regretted that decision in the past 20 years. Again, that’s something that only you can figure out. I, however, grew up with a comfortable amount of money. He said a while ago that he was saving money to get a ring, we'll he's got more than enough and hasn't even looked at it. “Why are you here?” He looked confused. she can take the ring and always take time to figure it out, at which point she can My last girlfriend broke up with me because I didn't want to get married. The fact that you threatened to break up the family and walk away because he won't commit to marriage tells me that marriage to you is more important than the relationship itself. Reply reply He won’t marry you without a Not all relationships end because something bad happened: There are reasons to break up with someone you love, too. It's that simple, and all other stuff he may come up - like the ring - with is just excuses. Now about my breakup story, in these 2 years we have had a lot of fights mostly because of lack of communication, in which some were my fault and some were his. Op argument is reasonable. Our wedding is supposed to have been early next year. So when we got back to our hotel I asked him why he Even after my break up im not able to hate him or what he did, because i feel he is one of the best guys i met. and a big part of me was hoping he would propose we get back and nothing. Don’t be surprised if you break up and he’s immediately engaged to someone else in a short period of time. Only to say (after we broke up) that he wanted a less independent woman, and just didn't want to be alone and was going to lead me on for as long as he could because he never fell in love but liked that I loved him and he cared about me. Probably because he knows you want marriage and is anticipating that you might break up. Maybe your partner loves you, loves being with you, but he’s afraid you’re not the right person to be the mother of his children. Yes I’ve TLDR- my partner won't propose unless I take his name. Don’t Now his excuse for not marrying me is just that we don’t have enough money, because we’re both going to Harvard (and they’re EXPENSIVE). Almost a year ago, my boyfriend and I agreed we'd get engaged, but he still hasn't proposed. i don’t want to nag, but i want to spend And just to be clear, he won’t marry you before the baby is born because he won’t marry you at all. I willing dated him knowing he wasn’t well off financially. Most people would prefer a sincere, heartfelt moment over a never-ending charade of “just wait a bit longer. This is a question more for those men/women who broke up with a long-term partner because the intimacy was almost gone (sex, cuddles, random hugs/kisses). After we broke up, he was all, “let’s get engaged!” Turns out, not getting married was not my main issue with him. Tldr: Gf broke up with me after I told her I never want to get married. But she learned what she wanted and needed from a relationship. I also have some issue with him being stingy and i tried to While he was there he realized he didn’t miss her at all. He sounds like a wannabe "daddy dom" because he saw it in porn or read about it somewhere. It may go against logic, that men need to feel independent and self-reliant, while at the same time, feel needed by their woman, for financial, physical and emotional support, but that appears to be the way it is. In either case, he should be upfront about it instead of just sweeping it under the rug. he doesn’t want me if he suggests to break up that much right? i’m so sad but at the same time i’m numb. You may feel the need to prove to yourself that you can get him back if your confidence was hurt when you were broken up with. and it absolutely broke me, because if he's not ready after 10+years, he's never going to be ready. I could throw around stats that say that people who wait over five years to get married are more likely to The reality is that the future is uncertain and in 10 or 15 years down the road he isn't sure if he's still going to be with you and doesn't want that piece of paper in his way. Consider if you truly want him to take you back, or if you only want him back because he broke up with you. Sure, there’s a chance you won’t break up. AITAH for breaking up my engagement because my fiance wanted to invite my family to our wedding. Ultimately he told me that if I wanted to get married right now, I should be with someone who wanted the same it felt like he was cutting my heart in pieces My boyfriend and I are coming up on 5 years together this summer, and he hasn't proposed yet. In the morning he woke me up at 7am and told me to wake up because he wanted to take me to the spa, I was pretty surprised cause it wasn't a special day or anything, but I was all in for it. However because he's unsure while his partner is 100% sure, he should break up with her since they both have conflicting future goals. Good luck. But that's also the revised take after he realised people weren't sympathetic enough to "him" and too supportive of her for being a bit hesistant about a major life decision. He knew he’d never propose and if he did he’s only be doing it to pacify her and he’d end up miserable. He was toxic in many other ways as well but TFG he did not propose because I finally got sick of his shit and we broke up. yep. You have every right to want that and break up if he won't propose. However, during the breakup, he pulled out the engagement ring he had bought and proceeded to propose. Here’s Why He Won’t Propose. he was sweet, respectful and never had feelings of anger or jealousy. Put the shoe on the other foot. He wanted to to hold onto to appease you. After a lot of fighting and discussion, I gave the ring back two months afterward with no intention of breaking up with him that getting the ring back completely crushed him for a long time, which I think might play into this whole thing. I have Here are 7 possible reasons he won't propose, what to do next, and how not to go crazy when you're obsessed with engagement. But here you are, waiting around while he is taking forever to pop the question. He won't marry you Reply reply You don't need to "wait and see" if he proposes by the end of May. We broke up on my best friends wedding day where I was the maid of honor. "I dont want to marry a guy right now" (your prospective) and "I want to marry you" (his prospective). I want to believe thats why he struggles to plan for/see our future together. Him saying things about not making you happy after you asked him again seem like he’s trying to break it off without making it seem Why Won’t He Propose? (13 Possible Reasons) Chat With A Relationship Counselor Online 24/7 Chat Now I think you should try and make a safe space but don’t force him to open up. If you've been turning down his proposals and flirting with Breaking up to try to force a proposal is suuuper manipulative, would not recommend trying that. well both of you are not wrong here. Don't waste your youth on a man-baby. ME. You're actually correct. Anyway we broke up and he kept telling me we're not meant to be. He says he wants to have a good job before getting married, which I understand, but I want a little more commitment after being together for so long. As a child, his day was impacted massively by this parent’s up and down moods, Lol you probably hit the nail on the head. He’s too comfortable with the way things are. They are 29. I once broke up with a guy because he couldn’t read the subtitles in a foreign movie fast enough to understand it. He isn't going to propose. you were dating for quite long time but you dont want to marry him and he wants to settle down. It can leave you feeling restless and struggling to fill the white space left behind by the relationship. A few hours ago i asked him if he wanted to sleepover when we meet tomorrow but he said no because he wanted to go the gym in the next morning. He dragged his feet at every single step in the relationship. Have you talked about marriage earlier in the 10yr relationship? And if so, why didn’t it go anywhere? We won't break up to find someone better to get married to because we don't plan to marry anyone. He's right, you are not compatible, simply because he can't or won't be. I guess I still want the link to him and I guess I'm also secretly hoping he turns around and Probably the #1 reason a man hesitates to propose is because of some kind of fear. He shouldnt have to propose just because hes the 'man'. We were new. and he says yes, it doesn't mean he'll actually go through with it. My family are taking his side. Think about the theory of sunk costs. if you feel different and want different things its fine to breakup. He has a very fucked up notion of what sex is supposed to be like. I was immediately alarmed, waking him up with my gasp of discomfort. It's not just about a piece of jewelry. Can tell this is all about “you” if you really do love him leave him because honestly he deserve better than you. He has absolutely no motivation to propose because he already has everything he would have if he was married. He always tried to patch up and I always used to say yes. You will watch everyone I recently left my boyfriend of 5 years because he just wouldn't commit to me. Alternatively, the breakup might have made you realize how much you care for him. He's not flat out rejecting her. Lemme get this straight your thinking of breaking up with your partner because he’s waiting for an epic moment to propose. ESSENCE's own Matchmaking Duo talk with hundreds of men a year about why they are so quick to move into another relationship after a big breakup. By talking about marriage all the time, and breaking up with him because he won't propose, you are showing him that all you want is a marriage, not him. It's an awful thing. She's now married to a wonderful guy. He said he wants to be married someday, but he won’t propose with pressure. He may be afraid of commitment, or he just doesn't want to get married to you. When I show him what rings I like, he'll say "I don't have the money for that. He replied why not and that he can hold off on it. So I did. i need help. Just read your post. I was really furious and asked to break up. Breaking up and then getting back together at all causes anxiety and trust issues, it's why people recommend not going back to someone after you break up. Andrew has always been a 'prankster' and make jokes with me all the time, and I do it to him too, but today he took it way too far. They broke up and we got together 5 months later. He said that he now wanted to wait till he was financially ready. Because I cant see inside of his head. This is a man with ZERO emotional intelligence and I’m glad he cruelly forced her to leave over nothing because she’s way better off. Money never has been a concern or a value to me. Like, dayum. He said to give it some time and that we'd talk more. “I broke up with you last night. He's He said something last night when it came up in conversation (again) that really hurt me. my partner and i have been together for three years and talk about a family and being together for the rest of our lives. Suddenly, he said he needed to take a break because he couldn't be in a relationship with anyone while he was grieving. He said only once but i don't believe him. Start the conversation saying you want to get married, figure out if he is on the same page and then agree what to do. Break up with him because you Yeah if you guys are otherwise in love and in a commited relationship on the whole, it's kind of a huge kick in the face to break up with a guy (just because he won't propose) who bought a There are a myriad of reasons why your boyfriend won’t propose but we have narrowed down the 14 main reasons your boyfriend might be holding off making the plunge. On our last night there it still never happened. Even if you don't break up, every year ‘I won’t move in with you until we are engaged. There were so many people around, and I felt so much pressure to say yes. People can be engaged for years and years. He is so crazy about money and what’s his is his and mine is mine. I went through something like this with my ex-husband when I was young. Wishing you all the best in life and love, Your coach when you’re thinking, “I broke up with him and he is ignoring me” Adrian I (23F) want to break up with my partner (23M) of ~2yrs. I suffer of alexithymia, which means that I hardly recognize my and others emtions, and this is a hard obstacle for my life, work and my relathionships with others. 16. In the past few years, we had discussed getting married in Summer 2013, then Summer 2014, and it keeps getting pushed back because he won't propose. The only chance of possibly (not definitely) making something happen is if you break up with him. " Instead he is saying nothing. This is where he is in life and is just not where you are. He says you were pushing me. What an actual joke. and I trust it won't occur--but it should. We argued a bit but he went to sleep. Reply reply Break up with him, The first, if important to you, can be separated from the second. Well I guess I fucked that up cause my boyfriend broke up with me. Like the dude said, she can take the ring and always take time to figure it out, at which point she can always change her mind. He just had tons of anxiety about marriage so kept dragging his feet until she pushed him into the pool so to speak. But he also didnt want to change so much of his life, like his routine and stuff. Now, while there is nothing wrong with a different point of view in the matter, it also means that you and this man are not compatible because you essentially want two different things that neither of you should Scared getting engaged won’t fix core issues, scared of divorce, unsure about wanting children. We started dating when I was 23 and broke up when I was 29 because he was always saying he needed more time to be ready. I feel like I'm dying :'(Lisa: Interesting article. Let him see that you have your act together on your own and that you're ready to move towards marriage. I'm I don't think it's his intention. But I still feel that somewhere in the back of his mind, he won’t commit to me because he is still hung up on their relationship and doesn’t take me as seriously. He doesn't want an open relationship, therefore he broke up with you because he feels When I woke up in the morning, he was in bed beside me. She probably also knew he won’t find anyone. On my birthday this year he kept saying he was getting me something small, and something I've been asking for. When he refuses to acknowledge the breakup or acts as if it's just a temporary situation, he's likely in denial about the reality of it all. Also, one can always accept the proposal, be engaged for a few years, and then get married. I’ve been going through a similar experience. And if he does want it "You're trying to hold me down! I'm not your slave! I'm free. If he did, he would say "I see us getting married; my goal is to have x, y, and z in place before getting engaged. At least that’s what I get based on their history. You’re not sharing all your thoughts with your partner, because he IS the problem here. You must put the fear into him that he’s actually losing you. After 2 years and a half , and after he proposed to me he broke up with me because he is not financially stable and he can’t be in this commitment, i beg him not to leave even i told him that i will pay for for whatever he want but he told me he can’t be with me anymore. Recently I have been thinking about when the right time Also he says “he’s over it” just mere weeks or less after proposing because of a fabricated reality (or most likely because he’s embarrassed). Do he said I shouldn’t waste my time with him and we could eventually be friends. I would looove for my boyfriend to propose to me right this second. Yeah, you're going on 4 years. I don't know how many times he cheated because he didn't think 'we will made it that far'. For whatever reason, he does not want to marry you. More importantly, it’s time you started Why your boyfriend won’t propose? He thinks you don’t need him. (Really cheap ones too, I don't need super fancy and he knows this. But my and his parents are telling me that 'Im wrong. He did propose and they got married. He is in denial of the breakup Denial is a powerful thing. Come in or walk around and dont have to stress about things. Is he worth He is drawn to emotional women because he had an emotional or dramatic parent, but then he stays emotionally separate from them. But because he knows it's so important for me, he will marry me This sound just like m relationship with my ex -- I wanted to get married, but he didn't. After 10 years still no ring, or moving towards engagement is really a breaking point. One of the sure signs he won’t propose is when a man blatantly tells you that he does not believe in the institution of marriage. So how do you make a guy finally realize that you’re the woman of his dreams? He decided he wanted to see other people so we broke up for 6 years and were both with other people. I told him three and a half years ago that I was ready again. ’ Now he’s pulling it again by telling her she can’t break up with him because he thinks it’s stupid to break up! She didn’t even actually ask for permission, but now that he’s said he won’t give it On the final day of the ultimatum, he presented me not with a ring and a proposal, but the promise of one day soon. “You had a dream we broke up, Lena?” “It–” I paused. He doesn't want to propose, and he uses this elaborate excuse to keep you from leaving. There are physical qualities of his that I find unattractive, but I hardly see them because I love the person he is, not the packaging he comes in. “He’s just not that into you. Reply reply Our sex life went downhill. It is only normal to expect a man to propose to you when you have been in an exclusive relationship for quite some time ( a few years). We talk about it quite frequently actually, just because he brings it up all the time. I break up with Victor because he’s cheated at me and he’s abuser since September, 2017. He just won't do it. NAH, different strokes, but it's kind of weird to break up with somebody because they won't propose. This can feel like a lonely time. Pursue the hobby you’ve always wanted to try. Now i dont know if i should keep going with him or not. i saw an interesting stat that dating for over 4 years before marriage has worse outcomes in terms of divorce. like this has happened so Girlfriend broke up because I was not ready for marriage. Sounds like there was a lot of lead But if it’s something you really want and he doesn’t, that needs to be addressed. A few days before the break up he said he didn’t want to move in and then we had a big fight then he broke up with me. Jessica . He left her out of the blue, she was hurt. We broke up over it, but I'm happily married to someone else now, and I look back at my past relationship and I wish I had left sooner! The reason he won’t marry you is because you’re already giving him everything that he wants, and he has no He then called me up and said "I am not interested in you romantically". It's not a goal for him such as it is for me. I told him he was a total douchebag, which he agreed, and I asked him why he didn't answer when I confronted him the previous month, and he said he couldn't answer then because he didn't know himself. Either work on his marriage or leave it. This time he broke up with me and I asked him, Begged him to not give up on us again. She lost out for whatever her reason. Whenever I try to walk away for good he won't leave me alone and begs me to stay, but he is still not sure if he wants to commit to me. Nothing happened though, at least that I could see. Know you’re not alone. and he won't ever want to be committed to me and I'll end up with a broken heart. He's 22. and if you dont want to He won't propose because he doesn't want to marry you. or he won’t like it because of the hours, or being asked to go in early/stay late, etc. Theirs is a test relationship on the road towards marriage as a goal. he broke up with you seems to be quite expected reaction. The prolonged passive aggressive hissing fit ain't it. She loved him, so she was fine with it. If he didn’t before, then he still won’t. Reply reply Past_Ad_5629 • This. She's also a lot happier with her husband, because she feels It is true that he didn’t keep photos of them, and doesn’t try to contact her or her family, and doesn’t look them up as they are blocked on everything. He’s never had a lot of money because he was adopted by an older woman with little money, she could barely support his and his sister. ” If he cannot settle on a proposal plan after years, the issue likely doesn't lie in creativity or timing. ” – MessyEnema. He won’t talk to me and he won’t even look at me. Reply reply B4DG3RR3D • I agree with this. My boyfriend (18m) doesn’t know if he wants to break up with me (18f) we are in a long distance relationship and we have been for the past 9 months but recently my boyfriend doesn’t know if he is committed to our relationship because he wants to do all these things like spend more time with his friends and start hobbies but he feels like he cant because then he would have no time to My problem is that he just won't propose. But he literally said he sided with his sister’s opinion that needing time to think was “girl code” for his gf having an affair and that “the more I thought about it the more it made logical sense” and that’s why he broke up with her. Before having that discussion, you should decide for yourself whether it's a deal-breaker for you. He needs to understand that you want to be in a nice environment, a "grown-up apartment". I said "he should either break up or propose" because I cant see LTR breaking up because the guy doesn't want to get married or have kids, but then within 2 years he's engaged and with a kid on the way Guys that want non-escalating relationships, AKA never moving in together and being perpetually in the dating stage If he won't even engage in conversation he certainly won't become engaged to you. That reason was idiotic. I have mentioned in the past that I wanted to marry her, but I never proposed. *** Krixta: I just broke up with my boyfriend because I knew he would never propose. But it’s not an engagement ring. You don't need to propose, you can just talk about marriage purposely and seriously. If you can live the rest of your relationship not being married, that's great and I don't think you should break up solely because he won't propose. When I expressed my disappointment, he chided me for giving him an ultimatum at all. How about you think about why or over what you are fighting about. " I literally have started picking out rings under $800 because again, we share expenses, I know he can afford it. But, he won't pull the trigger and ask me to marry him. I was talking to him the last couple of days expressing my hesitation, and he is just furious. you’ll never have this again—life right now as you are. So the proposal won't be a deciding The reason your boyfriend is making all of these excuses as to why he won't propose is because he doesn't want to get married to you. If you are basically belittling him or simply ignorant to what he wants to say otherwise maybe he actually just wants to give up because he's tired of But unfortunately, many men won’t propose because they’re afraid their girlfriend won’t be a good mom. If he starts making efforts he should get used to it and meet halfway. Dear Jessica, Thanks for the kind words and the all-too-familiar story. In my opinion, we are just too young. I wanted to marry him. Anyways we go on the trip and long be hold there was no proposal. i think it's So, until he feels like he's got his life back on track, chances are he won't be proposing. And by break up with him I mean really actually do it. (28F) have been together for 4 years and engaged for a year. OP is NTA. I havent spoken to him since (today is the next day). he's not going to. That being said, no one - not her boyfriend or yours should be pressured into marriage. ) Please, please, please do not have kids with someone to save a relationship. Edit: I would like to clarify that I did try to break up with him numerous times but he was the one who suggested a break. I still think about Halle most of the time and I wake up and miss having her next to me. Then he said I was rushing on my decision and needed a month. It seems like you've been honest about what you want and he hasn't been honest about if and when he's going to provide that. Well, He (25M) won’t propose until I (23F) lose more weight Advice Subs Link to original post. as the protocol promoted here seems to be for women to not chase men who break up with them. Break up with him because you deserve someone who wants and loves you without you needing to beg for it. Your girlfriend doesn't even want to be engaged let alone married. Later that night I tell him I can't do this anymore I'm done. He will never be completely clean tho, thats for sure The more upset the woman gets about a lack of commitment, the more he feels that it would be irrational to propose, since she is showing herself to be difficult and dramatic. 15. I proposed to my gf (let's call her Sara), 6 days ago, and she rejected my proposal and broke up with me due to my illness. You won't get what you want out of this relationship. One of the likely reasons why your boyfriend You don't need to "wait and see" if he proposes by the end of May. Maybe he should step up and take active and deliberate actions to create a realistic outcome he can live with. I’m scared it’s never going to happen and I also don’t feel like I’m allowed to bring it up because “bringing it I've been on two dates since we broke up 3 months ago but neither of them went beyond a casual one night thing. DR I need advice on what to do about my boyfriend who won’t propose until I lose weight, but we’ve been together 7 years and I But it is his responsibility to break up if he feels like he wont propose. No one wants a proposal after they’ve just broken up. You experience a myriad of emotions, and sometimes, you feel guilty or even Mostly he just said because he didnt want to. I was with my (then bf, now) husband for 2. i’ve said i don’t want to have a child until we’re married, and they’ve said that’s okay. He knew at that moment he needed to end it. All those things he mentioned are things that people do when they have a solid foundation of trust and care for each other and the man/woman stops as and when the other partner wants. Focus on yourself. He won’t because he can’t deal with the post-breakup feelings and it’s easier to believe his own version of what happened. Although, most of you still dont understand me. I know I've been difficult but I asked him if he'd reconsider in a few months and he kept saying no and that I shouldn't think about what I want to happen. He doesn't want me to leave or move out, but he is sure he can't ask me to marry him until he knows for certain. “What is it? Are you okay?” He started. Don't ask when is he going to propose/ is he stringing you alone. He told me he wanted to marry me 1 month in and proposed after 10 months. And you don’t Marriage is just a piece of paper. , Relationships, 30 replies Want to keep in touch with family through Facebook but boyfriend doesn't want me to, Relationships, 117 replies He then said it wasn’t important for him to get married, a proposal after 1 1/2 years is too soon for him, he is okay with it to marry after we had kids. This has been going on for three years. But fear can have many disguises. You reject a proposal because you don’t want to get married to that person. He has anxiety issues and anytime we talk about it, he clams up and cries. I accepted the proposal, and there is now a semi-viral video of his proposal. I was on the verge of breaking up with him but he eventually calmed down with the comments and to be honest, I was scared of having nowhere to go, having had an unstable home life. I'm sorry. Literally move out of the house and refuse to consider coming back. He seemed upset and hurt after the big fight and said he didn’t love me anymore. The proposal symbolizes a shared Here are five things to do if your man just won’t propose. This showed him that when things get rough, you're going to leave him until he fixes things on his own. Both of our family have almost 30 years of friendship(and our moms are friends since their teenage years)and they won't let that break because of her. The fact that he will sort out a proposal because you threatened to end the relationship shows that he doesn't want to lose you and break up the family. Consider this one of the signs he doesn’t want to marry you and walk away. He said he never proposed bc he never wanted to marry her. Let’s say she was the one wanting to get married and he was dragging his feet. I’m Chinese and wanted to share one of my favorite Chinese movies with him, and when he told me the movie was boring because the subtitles disappeared too fast for him to read, I was hit the realization that it wasn’t going Andrew has always been a 'prankster' and make jokes with me all the time, and I do it to him too, but today he took it way too far. I feel for you, because I just broke up with a man that I really love, because he wouldn't set a wedding date, and we would have been together 6 years this December. i need your opinion in this problem If he doesnt want to compromise, it is an issue. Consider Deciding when to stop waiting for him to propose could set you free from a cycle of doubt and frustration. so I remind him that I told him in the beginning I didn't not have any intentions of ever getting married again. He'll get over you. I'm furious for you. May sound harsh or a gross generalization but, if he wanted to he would. OFF. Everyone would be saying “dude, she’s 29 and she can’t wait forever. so every time me and my boyfriend get into an argument, he wants to break up. So don't break up with him because he hasn't proposed. And I can't break up with him because of something happened five years ago' blabla. Whether you’re in a relationship with no proposal in sight, are in a long engagement, have already gotten married in court and are now waiting for the wedding, or in the midst of planning a proposal you are welcome here! But we fight a lot. He then changed and said he doesn't know what kind of rings I like or what to get so I showed him a few that I liked. You're uncomfortable because it's awful. He shouldn't have gotten married. He's thinking about assets. But I know he won’t because he wants to pay off all his debt first. He will spend his life doing things when he Based off of what you wrote I feel like he bought it because of your joke. He didn't say no and break up with her. This guy is My bf of 5yrs is dragging his ass on a proposal because he wants everything to be "perfect" and it is PISSING. It won't work, you will wind up broken up, but you can't break up with your child. He's scared!" to coerce/emasculate him into commitment. He's playing just as many games as she is. We’ve been together almost 9 years now (6 married) and I asked him after he proposed to me why he never proposed to his previous gf when they were together so long. It won’t fix any issues. ’ Gives BS excuses why they have to wait. Boyfriend broke up with me because he lost feelings, I need advice :(, Relationships, 15 replies I broke up with my boyfriend because he was selfish and a pothead. That said, i am now I broke up with him because he admittedly wasn't sure if he wanted to commit anymore (after 3 years) and for other reasons along those lines. It really cheapens something that’s important to them. propose or break up already!” He did the right thing on a perfect timeline, age wise. Though there might be many reasons your ex won’t talk to you, don’t forget that you are more in control of the situation than you might realize, and the most important factor is your self confidence. i wish it would happen. I want to have sex with whomever I want! It's my body - HANDS OFF!". He is not going to breakup with her, the OP said he is fine with staying with her and not being married. It doesn't prove anything about your relationship. I’m like you. Probably to buy time and or so you wouldn’t bring up marriage again in a more serious tone. It’ll out a temporary bandaid on them. Like, you want to spend the rest of your life with him but then you create a situation where you Going through a breakup can be tough. I'm afraid I'm going to be disappointed if it doesn't happen soon. I was briefly engaged to one in college and broke up with him when I saw that he wasn't going to shape up. I know my brother and they are That's not entirely fair. Really, I'd be happy with a ring stuck in some popcorn watching HIMYM re-runs in bed. . For instance, if you realize that you're leaning too much on this relationship I know my mental health won't be healthy if I stay. and if he does, inevitably it's going to be out of obligation and it's already going to feel sour. He loved her and didn’t want to break up. I would love to get married to him but I am not sure I want to change my name. He says loves me and that he doesn't want us to break up. I want you to have a memorable engagement”. Ask him why he is hesitating? If it is money, there will always be money problems. You might very well put off the wedding for that reason, but it’s not a reason to say no. We've been living together for 2 and half years, and have two dogs together. He only came back begging me to move in AFTER I broke up with him. get her after he has saved up enough for her ticket fare and also if she gets approved for a petition when they get I really want to get engaged, but I feel like if I ask, he'll say, "I'm still going through a divorce!" That's true, of course, but I feel like I'm paying for his last relationship. If she's not sure now, she won't be sure even if u give her more time. To be honest, he may not even experience this fear on a conscious level, nor would he label it as fear. He'll talk about random things, like which venue we would use, the type of food we would serve, whether we should get dance lessons before hand, etc. And he really didn’t see the reason behind getting married at all. 3. He's just telling you what he feels because he hasn't developed the emotional regulation and maturity to know it's inappropriate to treat his recent ex like his therapist (or even realize he is doing that) But just because he FEELS like he will never get over you doesn't mean he won't. I would wait until your anniversary then break up if he doesn't He seemed confused and said he didn't know what he wanted. He's worried you're just going to leave him again when something goes wrong or things get rough. At that If your partner already broke up with you because he said you had just become so stressed out lately and both of you were always fighting then it’s pretty obvious that you shouldn’t fight your way to getting him back. My guess - he said "eventually" because he wanted you to leave him alone and wasn't sure how to do that, since you The other day I tried to break up with my boyfriend of one year. lfzvo eubaf qhfbke abiky jmkbg xxgl crm rkbe eanex jlftioe